It's been forever and a day since I last posted and most probably don't check LJ anymore. But i decided i needed to post.
Saturday had been 1 years since Grandma passed away. It was hard to think it'd already been then long and how much i long to be with her. So many coincidences in the last week brought a flood of memories back and i guess i don't think it really was a coincidence after all....it was meant for me!!! I still see a picture of her and me almost everyday, and still have the pot of flowers/plant i gave her when she had been sick in the summer....I have somehow managed to keep then breathing ! :-D and green. what an accomplishment i felt!!! of course i stopped into the cemetary to see her and gpa even with the 12 inches of snow on top....i held off getting something to place there b/c the weather is just not right yet. It's been a long hard year, but i do truly believe she is keeping an eye open and watching my every move. I love her very much and miss her dearly......until our time to meet again.....
jared and i had a huge talk this weekend, granted i did A LOT, and when i say a lot, not a little, A LOT of talking...he did a lot of listening and then he finally responded. i held back nothing and it felt good. everythign that we talked about what stuff i had been thinking about lately as well as himself and it fet good. I also feel that it will help our relationship to grow more and further is branches. It was definately needed b/c there are/were a lot of misunderstandings as well. I just hope we will continue to talk the way we did Sunday....2 1/2 years later, but hey, it happened! I love him deeply and i'd do anything to help him out......
well i should go read pharm. yeah for me. not!
until next time...
- Mood:
peaceful
things never slow down....:-(
Its hunting season! HOORAY!
Although I'm a little inexperienced.
School is almost done for the semester.
Thanksgiving is this week!
Mmmmmmm.
I love working out.
its my time to myself.
anywho, i should go...enjoy another hour before i go out in the shitty weather!
xo
i hope things can work its way out of the hole.
getting ready to take a shower.
please pray for kristen as she has her surgery today.
I'm excited for this weekend.
I'm ready for fall weather...
hate this warm stuff!
School is great.
Loving life to the fullest.....
And worse off, classes begin this week!!! OH my.
things have been very busy but good!
i actually have to babysit her in like 10!
Working.
babysitting!
horses.
cleaning.
weddings.
you name it, its going on!!!
and i got my hair did.
i'll be getting a pic up!
take care
- Mood: chipper
i miss the random door opening of the bathroom b/c she needed to go wherever i went!
I miss her laying down by the shop waiting for me to come back up from the horse barn...
i miss having someone to lay in my lap and keep me company
i miss the routine of letting her out
i miss her craziness of running like a wild rabbit jumping up and down!!!
i just miss her.
at first i thought that i didn't want to have another dog b/c i could live with myself is something like that happened again...but i realize that I love the companionship that a dog brings to you, as well as the security, jared was gone for 2 nights and all i wished for was having macy here b/c seh would have alerted me....so in that matter, any dog for sure.
it is fair week yet again.
it's hard to believe summer is almost over....
hope all is well with everyone.
love
- Mood: content
and i'm terribly upset.
I try to be "tough" in front of jared, but i just had to get back out of bed b/c I'm not, and I don't want anything said to me.
She got hit by a car, and the worse part is that i heard the thump (but didn't think much b/c i didn't know she was outside) and thought it was strange, and then this poor girl came to tell me that she saw it, but it wasn't her, and she just wanted someone to know if it was their dog, i felt bad for the girl who told me b/c i don't think she wanted too......
the strangest part, is that my dog doesn't go in the road, she hasn't since at the latest december.
she always runs behind the barns but NEVER in the road.
I'm going to miss seeing her all the time, to greet me, to greet jared....
She was such an amazing dog, i could not have asked for a better one.
I don't think i could ever get one again living here.........I just can't.
oh man.................:'( :'( :'( i did not need this right now
it's going to be a long night...................................
- Mood:
depressed
I just wanted to drop a quick entry:
This weekend was smashing.
It was amazingly fun!!
Saturday we (jared and I) went shopping!
He bought me a dress for the wedding in 2 weekends..and he had a tremendous amount of patience for me trying on dresses!!!
We also went out to dinner which was very good!!!
Then we waited around til 1030 when it was time to go to the barrrrrrrrrrrrrrr.
my dad, my sister michelle, me, jared, gena, rich, tina, greg, kristin, jared, kevin, ryan, kristy, eric, kris.....
what a great party!
and what a blast!
I drank ENOUGH, yet was able to get past the porcelin toilet for the night! YESS!!!
it was nice to spend the time with family and friends and i don't think i would have wanted my 21st to go any other way!!!
lata.
not sure whats going down yet.
personally i've been GREAT/Amazing!!!
things around me are very unstable!
but i'm dealing with things but at the same time not trying to get to absorbed in eveything.
i had a good time at drummond....it's so beautiful :)
i just wanted to drop a quickie to make sure you knew i was still alive.
i'm sick of caring.
wouldn't life be easier if i didn't have a heart?
so then i wouldn't have to feel bad about others?
***1 week and 2 days until jared and i go on vacation***
can't get away soon enough!
- Mood:
confused
thats why i hate waiting a month and a half to do a real shop and spend it all at once.
had sooo omuch fun at softball last night, hit great and even got to pitch--struck the 3rd out by going down looking!
then i got to drive marci and carla home...dd, only for a few more weeks:)
2 weeks and its drummond---kick ass!
well well i should get going
1111---making a wish*****
lata
- Mood:
hot
Jared and I have done things in the past few weeks that in the 2 years we've been together hadn't done before, which has been great, amazing, superb, etc. Needless to say it's been fun.......<3 Watching all my dreams come true, lost in this moment with you.
I've been playing ball....we are 2-1--had a very crappy game thursday, but that happens once in a while!!
Other issues in my life have either begun to heal or are on the back burner.
Lost my favorite outdoor cat ever this week...my aunt found him with a broken back and put him down. He followed us everywhere on the farm, he loved to be on jareds work bench or sitting in the tractor seat. Most of all, I miss the fact that he's not their to greet me when I get home..I long to see him again. <3 Buddy.
I do have a few kittens in the barn...so hopefully they'll be friendly and stick around!
The horses are pigs as usual, but cute as can be. I love going out to see them, they are amazing. Which reminds me, i got bucked off about a week and half ago!!! it hurt like a son of a gun but no major issues...except sometimes how i sit now. LOL.
Well I should get around...work in a few hours. Just wanted to update a bit.
Love
- Location:sofa
- Mood:
productive
hooray.
lost in thought and planning.
new path.
farming is almost finish:TODAY!!!!
lots of things to do......lata.
- Mood:
full
im burning inside.
- Location:living room
- Mood: crushed
BUT
you will respect me and the house i live in.
you will NOT come over here and run things your way b/c you think you own starman.
when i tell you how something is to be done,
it is suppose to be done that way whether jared is around or not.
you want to cuss at me, you can see your way out of here.
- Mood:
annoyed
Realize this: You always fret about MONEY.
You wonder what the weather is going to do.....ALL SEASON LONG.
You worry whether or not the equipment is together.
You worry whether or not the field is dry enough to plant.
You wonder how much fertilizer, insecticide and pesticide you will need (going at least $95 an acre x's 180 acre)
You wonder whether the seed you are using is quality seed.....
You stress about MONEY.
You wonder what the price of fuel is going to do.
You worry that when it's time to harvest the whether won't coroporate.
If the weather didn't coroporate, you have to spend extra money in drying the crops.
Are the tiles working in the field?
You wonder what the price to sell the crop is.
And, finally, at the end of the farming season...we get left with a $1000 profit to live off for the year.....thank god we both have other jobs.......(so you are left worry about farming even in the off season....)
*it is one of the most stressful, underpaid, undermined, unappreciated jobs around.
- Mood:
stressed
ps:
i HATE rosie o'donnel with a PASSION.
dumb bitch.
poor teddy, he's been outside like the whole time b/c barnum won't let him in the barn.
that's horses for you i guess.
I have to work in a little over an hour...yay. (not)
i need to get my study guide finished but i'm being lazy.
on lighter news...
I'd like to welcome another baby cousin:
Abbigail Lynn
6lbs 10oz
17 in...
12:15 AM May 1st
that makes 4 and counting...3 more on my side =7
+ 2 on jareds =9!
yikes...BABY BOOM
looks as though the rain has quit,
hopefully for the day :)
- Mood:
refreshed
trip to Bay City for a tractor part (aren't i so nice? ha)
3 loads of laundry hung out to dry.
dishes done.
laundry room cleaned.
walmart run.
1 more load of laundry. (still not done)
fed/cleaned the horses.
mowed some lawn.
made dinner.
emptied dishwasher.
2 pans of cookies baked.
mowed some more lawn.
study time......
feeling real good right about now.
- Location:on my rump
- Mood: busy
Monroe
believe it or not, inge is in that picture <3 (shh.don't tell:P)- Location:riley household
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cowgirlriley23- cowgirlriley23
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